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Actor Ashton Kutcher hosts; Them Crooked Vultures perform "Mind Eraser, No Chaser" and "New Fang." Sketches include "On the Record w/ Greta Van Susteren," "Gertrude's Will," "The View," "Cialis for Threeways Commercial," "Roman Slave Boy," "Weekend Update" with guests Liam (a teenager who just woke up), Eliot Spitzer, Jean K . Jean, and Garth and Kat, "What Is Burn Notice?" "Access Hollywood's Oscar Coverage," "An Even-Tempered Apology from Rahm Emanuel," and "Wedding Band.