Avsnitt 1

As the Garnetts celebrate Christmas, Alf berates Rita and Mike for only giving him 'Whiffs' as opposed to real cigars and second-rate socks whilst they have bought Else a dress and accuses his atheist son of hypocrisy. Rita is unable to recall his gift of a doll's house when she was little – though that was because Alf fell downstairs and broke it whilst drunk . When the carollers come calling, Alf is ready for then with a vase of dirty water but has to drink it when he sees the vicar heading the singers.